In honor of these deals, I present the following Ode to Procrastinating:
In college: Those who pulled all nighters the day before a paper was due or a big test was given just knowing that your amazing talent would get you through. Preparation? Bah!
In the office: Those who wait until 4 p.m. to start on a project the boss wants done by 5.
At sporting events: Those who come into the basketball game in the middle of the third quarter. “Enh! Only the fourth quarter matters, anyway!”
I know you. I know your type. Pack a week before a trip? Ridiculous! Two days out? For panickers. Even the night before? What time's the flight tomorrow?
Then what happens? One thing is forgotten every time. Phone charger is forgotten then remembered faithfully for the next 20 trips. But then that focus allows a razor to be left behind. Gah! Never again will I go unshaven!
Thus, here's my entire week before the next trip: “Razor, charger. Razor, charger. Razor, charger. Razor, charger. Razor, charger.”
Then, of course, the collar stays are in their little container in Las Vegas while the shirt splays collar points up towards the sky in New York. But at least the phone is charged, and stubble was rinsed down the drain!
So the daunting task of prepping for my five-week Europe vacation is at hand. Let’s go down the checklist with my buddy who I call "annoying:"
When do you leave? In two days, Wednesday.
What time is your flight? I don't know, I'll figure out the time tomorrow. Or Wednesday morning. Wait a sec -- what time do I have to get up?
Packed yet? Of course not! I'll do laundry, dishes ... How am I getting to the airport? Friend? Taxi? Eight thousand million dollars in airport parking costs?
Do you have what needs to be packed ready to go? What needs to be packed again? Oh yeah. Maybe I should make a list. Let's see, razor, collar stays and phone charger.
That’s it? For five weeks? In Europe? Yeah!
And how are you traveling? Checking bags or carrying on? Will the plane be able to accommodate your carry on? What about once you’re there -- will you have to lug everything everywhere or can you leave things behind and go off on a side trip and come back to retrieve items? How big of a bag are you packing? Two or three bags? Can you handle them all at once? Are you going up mountains or stairs? What about the weather? Packing for dress up nights out, fancy restaurants, hiking trips, ballet dancing and the beach? What about …
OK, OK, OK, stop!
I’m going to bed. I still have one hour tomorrow night to get everything taken care of, figure out the bag (bags?) situation and put the house in order.
Procrastination hasn’t burned me yet. Why stop now?!